A Recent Rut Reflection

I had my first emo phase at twenty-eight.

  • I finally took trips around Europe since moving to Germany in 2020 (before that, I had only been to Italy, Germany, and Spain in 2019 for a couple of days each)
  • I met some fantastic people on my travels and now have friends to visit all over
  • I developed a strong journaling habit where I write three pages per day and have now journaled over 350 pages in total
  • 90s California rock (e.g., Chili Peppers, Sugar Ray) and wishing I were a surfer living on the West Coast without any responsibilities
  • 90s + 00s grunge (e.g., Puddle of Mudd and Creed) and wishing I drove a camper van aimlessly without any responsibilities
  • 90s and early 00s rap (everything) and wishing I were a rapper without any responsibilities
  • screamo (e.g., Counterparts and Gideon) and wishing I were living in an industrial building and sleeping until 1 pm every day without any responsibilities
  • emo (Fallout Boy, Hawthorne Heights, and My Chemical Romance) and wishing I were in a toxic relationship without any responsibilities
  • Zach and I tried guessing how many days were left in lockdown because we wanted to go to heavy metal bars when they reopened
  • I agreed to join a hypothetical screamo band, even though I can’t sing or play instruments, and was dead serious about getting singing lessons
  • Zach and I were 4 hours late to a friend’s house for dinner because we practiced singing rock songs



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Macklin Buckler

Hi, I’m Macklin, a freelance writer from New York with an obsessive desire for authentic storytelling. You can find my writing on macklinbuckler.com.